I've decided that I can be overwhelmed by the smallest of things; and thoughts are the seeds of the things that overwhelm me. Not a completely profound flashing-light realization; but a verification of years of thinking, pondering, and dealing with a broad spectrum of situations.
When I was young, too many choices would overwhelm me; so my modus operandi [MO] became: eliminate the choices and choosing. Clearly that was not a good MO. Everyone has to make choices, every day, every situation. The plight or life of a human is predicated on choice and making the right choice at every given opportunity. And that is an overwhelming thought, for sure. No one is exempt. Like death and taxes, choice is high on the scale of 'it happens,' and your choices are the direction your life takes, until death.
There are so many maxims/axioms that are shouted from the heights and depths; and I believe some are true; and by balance, some are not true. Here are some examples that have been plaguing me:
1. Drinking alcohol is bad for you. The correct translation is: Drinking in excess is bad for you.
2. Sugar is bad for you. The correct translation is: Sugar in excess is bad for you.
3. Chocolate is bad for you. The correct translation is: Chocolate in excess is bad for you.
4. Driving any vehicle too fast for conditions is bad for you. This one is actually true.
5. Crying is a sign of weakness. This one is not true, not true at all.
There are probably a million more, and that is another topic for another time. For now, it's the overwhelming thoughts that are important to dispel.
When we are teaching children, we endeavor to instill in them thoughts that seem important to us as adults. My inward apprehension of too many choices allowed me to instill in my daughter that she had all the choices she wanted; while encouraging her to make 'the best choice.'
When it comes to teaching children not to drink alcohol until they are of legal age; do we also instill in them that 'drinking to excess' is what is really bad for you? Most teens want to drink alcohol at the earliest age they can sneakily get away with it. How about encouraging them to forego alcohol until their brains are fully developed [somewhere around the age of 25] instead of the 'legal age' and because alcohol kills brain cells?
Why is sugar bad for you? For one thing, it is addictive; and we make the best use of that addiction with cake, pie, candy, and highly processed foods. The problem lies in the choices we make. Juices from the grocers shelf often have high amounts of varying types of sugar in them; and what do we ply children with? Juice. Other choices include: "You were a good boy/girl, you get a cookie!" Sugar is a reward, learned early on in some countries. Now, if we could just teach moderation in the face of addiction.
The true 'life-shortening' choices we make have only one thing in common: IN EXCESS. There are many things in life that can be experienced once and that will have no negative impact on your longevity; and there are some things that carry a warning, as in 'your first experience of crack cocaine will have you addicted'. The warnings we should provide for children, should include the understanding that some choices are to be completely avoided whenever possible; and some choices should be given consideration. Unless you are willing to understand the choices before you, one cannot make the best choice.
And, when you are overwhelmed by having to make a choice, or choices, that is the time you need to step back and educate yourself on the consequences of all the possibilities. Difficult task in itself, but thinking about consequences is better than suffering them!
We need to learn how to choose; not just make a choice. We need to teach our children that not everyone gets to win in the games: when two people, or two teams play any game, there is one winner and one loser. Losing is not shameful, and winning isn't always the greatest. However, we all get the choice to do our best, no matter what the situation is: a game, a test, a challenge, and life! When you do your best, given it your all, tried your hardest...you've made the best choice possible. That makes you the winner, no matter what! Don't be overwhelmed by losing, by loss, by struggling, by grief, by winning, by grand achievements, by anything.
Let us teach our children moderation, love, appreciation for all things, respect, and give them the tools to navigate the best they can. Teach our children to learn by observing; learn by reading; learn by experiencing; and to grasp onto all that brings them joy without regret.
Ecclesiastes chapter 3, and Genesis chapter 11 give balance, endless choices, and a look at possibilities that some might miss. Excess is what is bad for you, so don't be overwhelmed by it.
Worthy you are for all that you choose. Live long and prosper. Your choice!
